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Old 2005-11-30, 11:10
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L,B'XXX L,B'XXX is offline
dsnt trust ne1 < 30
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Home is where the <3 is
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Just 2 things, In the second line "cast" instead of casted. Casted isn't a word according to the online dictionary. And it right spelling is "abhorrence."

Small things, I know, but sometimes little things like that can really change a song. Not so much in this case, but that's the only thing I could see wrong. It had good balance of thought. I liked the structure and I think it would make a pretty cool song.

Nice job.
My eldest son's bipolar website:

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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