RTT #174: The Passion of the ChriPST
 

If you had to commit suicide, for whatever reason, what method would you choose? For me it'd have to be Ordeal By Jew. I'd go to a Harlem restaurant and order something fishy. The combination of being made bankrupt and dying of food poisoning would be a noble and selfless way of illustrating the danger of unchecked Jewdom.

Hey, you might as well order something pork and make the chef squirm a little, too. You're not thinking clearly, Paddy.

Minge. Death by minge. Possibly via suffocation; I've not seen a minge that can fire bullets or administer pills or take the strain of a rope-man combination, although to be fair I've never been to Benidorm to see Sticky Vicky.

I'd quite like to drown in girl-cum, but not a straight forward drowning where I'm viscously hosed with it or simply dunked into a vat of it. I'd like to be in a giant canal-like structure with a ceiling and have the cum level gradually rise over the course of several hours, and it'd have to be kept at internal body temperature. I'd see if I could swallow enough of it to buy myself an extra minute or two of breathing space as I'm pressed against the ceiling, sucking in the last inch of air. I'd try and squeeze in a few underwater (undercum?) wanks before the big finale too, but I'd rather wait until I've drank my fill of the tangy honey drippings before that. I'm not a fuckin' weirdo, like.

It's a judgment on SaE that a ginger's suicidal fantasies mark a step up in general RTT quality.

Amadeus, when I see RTT I think of you. It sounds like a chainsaw r-t-t-t-t-t.

Neither have you seen a minge in general.

Ey!

I'd like to die by having an orgasm from a BJ that was so intense that the vigorous sucking would cause me to ejaculate all of my innards through my urethra and into the girl's stomach. I bet that would taste offal.

Or maybe a boxing match to the death with Ernest Hemingway.

You're naivety astounds me, Mansley. Haven't you seen their secret, sleeper cell training videos where they pick up quarters with ease and eject ping pong balls at deadly velocity? What do you suppose they were preparing for?

The problem was allowing them to vote in the first place. I wish Artie Kendall were president.

sheesh, has it ever taken this long for somebody to say CUNT?

If I offed myself, I would do some drugs and shoot myself at the top of a cliff or building. That way if the bullet fails I can still fall and have less chance of ending up as a vegetable.

Better a vegetable than a I can't remember what the joke was suppose to be.

If I'd commit suicide I'd do something extremely gross and splattering, probably rip up my stomach so my organs can fell out and then take a good nap of water in my mouth and then shoot my head off through my mouth. Thanks to physics and our anatomy the whole back of my head would explode. Fuck yeah

"johnmansley" is synonymous with "cunt". Wherever he posts thar shall be cuntage by default. And it's to his credit.

<3 I'm not the only one.

Oh, how to commit suicide. Well, that's easy. Strap a bunch of transmitting sensors on myself and then off to death by the cosmic gravitational shear at the very cusp of the event horizon of a black hole.

I also find it quite amusing that only yesterday a somewhat hysterical debate about young uns' talking about suicide on the net started in the political sphere here. Tripple-X, you're not taking your responsibility!

Hey, I had to tolerate my elderly grandmother wanting Kevorkian's number for years until I finally told her it was unlisted and she stopped so I'm just reading all the peepee envy going on as everyone tries to one up the next. Very creative to say the least, and I wonder how some come up with the ideas. I would like to think that all of you are stronger than that anyways since some have gone through some tremendous trials.

Sagan's dead, he ain't listening. How do you really wanna die?

So have you! I still have the newspaper clippings from The Ohio Turnip Stuffer case.

Good lord, Paddy! I was at the greenhouse yesterday and passed by some turnip plants and thought of you! haha (I'm glad I thought to insert the word "by" in that sentence.)

IT'S UNBELIEVEABLE WHAT NOISES CAN COME OUT OF YOUR GUTS OMG!
3 days now just gargling and bubbling and I dunno what. Fuck that's annoying

Ulcers? Be careful what you're ingesting. That doesn't sound too good, Gomers.