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-   -   2010 Tabby Awards! (http://metaltabs.com/forum/showthread.php?t=56564)

Dyldo 2010-12-20 13:05

2010 Tabby Awards!
 
Put on your best and get ready to roll out the red carpet (unzip 'em, Paddy) because it's time for the 2010 MT awards!

Copy the following and paste it in your post with your results. Multiple nominations are accepted.

Members:
* Most Irritating Member
* Least Irritating N00b
* Everyone's Favorite Little Bitch

Moderators:
* Most Unreasonable Nazi Arsehole
* Most attractive

General:
* Best Avatar
* Best Signature
* The "Where Are They Now?" Award, for the most conspicuous absence.
* The Keyballs Award, for biggest gap between online machismo and real life.
* Most likely to go to hell

And the Big Ones:
* Best Flaming of 2009
* Biggest Cunt

---

Members:
* Most Irritating Member - Dystopia
* Least Irritating N00b - Nomad
* Everyone's Favorite Little Bitch - Reqtum

Moderators:
* Most Unreasonable Nazi Arsehole - Everything we do is just and is spoken to us by God.
* Most attractive - Me.

General:
* Best Avatar - Paddy, only because it changes with the seasons.
* Best Signature - Mine, after edited by Paddy.
* The "Where Are They Now?" Award, for the most conspicuous absence. - Nihilist, FBS, and where the fuck is Chris?
* The Keyballs Award, for biggest gap between online machismo and real life. - Reqtum, and TD of course. Those pictures are so photoshopered.
* Most likely to go to hell - PST, because all Jews go to hell

And the Big Ones:
* Best Flaming of 2010 - Dysdopia's thread on how we should install "Drug Towns" or whatever the fuck he was talking about. Christ. Seriously? Or maybe his open letter to Bill O' Reily.
* Biggest Cunt - LBX

Gomli 2010-12-21 03:57

Members:
* Most Irritating Member - Dys
* Least Irritating N00b - D&Q or Blitz
* Everyone's Favorite Little Bitch - LB

Moderators:
* Most Unreasonable Nazi Arsehole - PST even though he's sexy
* Most attractive - Dyldo

General:
* Best Avatar - Dyldo
* Best Signature - no idea
* The "Where Are They Now?" Award, for the most conspicuous absence. - metal=life
* The Keyballs Award, for biggest gap between online machismo and real life. - Reqtum no doubt
* Most likely to go to hell - TD because he will like it there :love:

And the Big Ones:
* Best Flaming of 2009 (2010??) - Dys. I vote for him in this category for the next 10 years
* Biggest Cunt - Paddy

Wolfsherz 2010-12-21 06:54

Members:
* Most Irritating Member Requiem
* Least Irritating N00b Wapbamboom
* Everyone's Favorite Little Bitch Requiem. For real, fuck you.

Moderators:
* Most Unreasonable Nazi Arsehole Paddy
* Most attractive Chris

General:
* Best Avatar Paddy
* Best Signature LB'XXX
* The "Where Are They Now?" Award, for the most conspicuous absence. Infinity.
* The Keyballs Award, for biggest gap between online machismo and real life. Requiem
* Most likely to go to hell Dyldo cause it'd be cocky to nominate myself now would it.

And the Big Ones:
* Best Flaming of 2009 YOUR_GOD_IS_DEAD. Just to fuck up Dystopia's unanymous victory.
* Biggest Cunt I want those Avenged Sevenfoldfans back. Requiem.

Dyldo 2010-12-21 10:07

Didn't Infinity get banned? I can't remember. I might be mistaking him for someone else. And I totally forgot about the Avenged Sevenfold fans.

Wolfsherz 2010-12-21 13:45

Yup, over this

Dyldo 2010-12-21 14:16

Oh shit, I totally forgot about him.

YOUR_GOD_IS_DEAD 2010-12-21 19:08

Wait when did I get flamed?

johnmansley 2010-12-21 22:07

Members:
* Most Irritating Member Nobody really irritates me, but Dyldo gave me crabs so I guess that's as good a nomination as any
* Least Irritating N00b There were new members this year?
* Everyone's Favorite Little Bitch Reqtum

Moderators:
* Most Unreasonable Nazi Arsehole Sane, even though he was neither here nor an unreasonable Nazi Arsehole
* Most attractive Dyldo. You know it, I know it and Dyldo's priest sure knows it too

General:
* Best Avatar Mine, you Manc bastards
* Best Signature Any signature with quotes attributed to Reqtum
* The "Where Are They Now?" Award, for the most conspicuous absence. Sane. God damn, man, stop crying over your inevitable Ashes defeat, pull your kettlebell out of your slack back-minge and get back here
* The Keyballs Award, for biggest gap between online machismo and real life. Truth Devoid. All those pictures he posts are trawled from various bodybuidling sites. He's really a 14 year old boy with an ironic haircut who can easily fit into skinny jeans. Seriously, Reqtum bursting through his shirt Alien-style has to be the most hilarious thing I've ever read, machismo-wise
* Most likely to go to hell All of us, the Devil does have the best tunes after all. If only one of us can gain entry then it has to be Paddy for reasons too myriad to explain here

And the Big Ones:
* Best Flaming of 2010 The iwrestledabearonce thread, if that was this year
* Biggest Cunt Lady GaGa? Oh, sorry I thought you said biggest cock. In that case, how about Paddy's anal cunt?

PST 88 2010-12-21 23:54

Members:
* Most Irritating Member - I pretty much just talk to Dydlonic and Ginger on here, so I guess one of them
* Least Irritating N00b - L'B
* Everyone's Favorite Little Bitch - I know I'm repeating myself, but I honestly don't pay attention to what most of you guys post.

Moderators:
* Most Unreasonable Nazi Arsehole - Cumboy. Scouse is the new Nazional Socialism
* Most attractive - Jim. I've met him and Dyldo both in person, and one was a heaping bag of pussing wounds, and the other was Australian.

General:
* Best Avatar - mine, courtesy of Ginger
* Best Signature - Dyldo's, after I fixed it
* The "Where Are They Now?" Award, for the most conspicuous absence. - Chris. I know where Jim is, and he's too busy to talk to you
* The Keyballs Award, for biggest gap between online machismo and real life. - Dyldo, not because he's overtly macho but because there is a gaping hole where his balls should be. A gaping, prolapsed asshole.
* Most likely to go to hell - Paddy. Because Gingers are the Midwich Cuckoos, but without any of the hive mind capabilities. That I'm aware of.

And the Big Ones:
* Best Flaming of 2009 - 09, eh?
* Biggest Cunt - L'b's, because bobpurgis went through there, and he's enormous.

Dyldo 2010-12-22 10:22

Quote:
Originally Posted by PST 88
* Best Flaming of 2009 - 09, eh?


Fixed. Ass.

And I think I'm better looking than Jim. If we had a stare off and the loser was whoever got a stiffy first, I'm sure I'd lose. However, that doesn't mean he's better looking, it just means that I'm probably more gay. Gay!

Paddy 2010-12-22 10:27

Members:
* Most Irritating Member: You. Yeah, I'm talkin' to you, ya cunt.
* Least Irritating N00b: I can only assume "noob" is short for "Nubian", in which case it'd have to be Chris, pretty much by default.
* Everyone's Favorite Little Bitch: There are people here whom I consider little bitches, but by virtue of them being little bitches I almost certainly don't have a favourite, no more than I have a favourite venereal disease (syphilis).

Moderators:
* Most Unreasonable Nazi Arsehole: The only banning/suspending to have taken place for a long time was when I handed Dysentery his own ring-anus to him skewered on a hot dog which was also his thin penis. So I guess it'd have to be johncumley.
* Most attractive: If I'm ever in the mood to be fucked by Sam from I Am Sam JoeYngVai would be top of my list of candidates. Not only does he look like the completely fuckable Sean Penn, but he's also a slavering retard which makes oral sex just fantastic. Unfortunately he's not a mod, so I'll just have to remain celibate until he's promoted to a mod position, preferably one which was made vacant by the sudden and extremely violent death of MetalThrashingMad (SHE'S MINE, BACK OFF YA BIG FUCKER YA).

General:
* Best Avatar: Bobbi's, because it reminds us where "our troops" actually come from and better informs us in our decision about whether or not to support them.
* Best Signature: Like PST I have also chosen Dylan's, because of the sweet edits I've made to it. Second prize goes to Bobbi's, because it features me at my most profound.
* The "Where Are They Now?" Award, for the most conspicuous absence: Chris, definitely. Everyone else who was a regular and has now fucked off doesn't even enter my consciousness, but Chris' absence has left me empty, hollow and empty. More importantly his absence, and the lack of friendship we share as a result, has also left me without plausible deniability when someone calls me a racist. I just hope Dylan remains an active member so my raging homophobia continues to go unchallenged.

Also bunny.

* The Keyballs Award, for biggest gap between online machismo and real life: PST. He doesn't act macho in the traditional sense, but he makes up for his lack of physical prowess by paraphrasing large sections of his Ladybird Book of Cooking in order to pass them off as his own and score chef points off of poor culinary spastics like me.
* Most likely to go to hell: Bobbi. Much like in the mafia, if you vouch for someone who turns out to be a rat you get whacked along with him. Bobbi has put in so many good words for me with the big guy that she's gonna be in hell long before they even begin to process my paperwork.

And the Big Ones:
* Best Flaming of 2010: Wolfsherz's cystitis. It's especially awesome because he got it from his girlfriend, and it's even more awesomer because she got it from me. Not via sexual coitus; I just decided to lend her my Burt Reynolds signature toilet seat without washing it first. To be fair, it wasn't clean when I unscrewed it from the toilet of a swimming bath in Belfast either. Not sure what I was doing there, I just woke up with a bleeding anus and decided to use the toilet seat as a cum-shield and to fend off moustached body-builders as I made my escape, and the rest is [Wolfsherz's medical] history.
* Biggest Cunt: All yo mamas', because my willy is massive. I know what you're thinking, especially if you're PST, "but that's just a slight variation on PST's one!" But the thing you have to remember is that you're a cunt. Not as big as yo mamma's, but a cunt is a cunt, and you're definitely an "a", therefore you're a cunt. I'm sure Mansley will explain my workings, but suffice it to say that you're definitely a cunt.

drawn&quartered 2010-12-22 10:42

I propose adding a "wall of text" award for this or next year, but it is pretty obvious who will get it :p

PST 88 2010-12-22 10:45

A long time ago, it was a guarantee that I'd win that award.

I'm more laconic now.

And I'm sure you were more attractive before herpes took over the totality of your visible flesh and syphilis degraded your mind, Dyldyl, but the fact of the matter is that Jim is an immaculate hunk of manhood and you are a walking 10th grade Health class poster crowing the upsides of abstinence.

Dyldo 2010-12-22 11:11

Just because my atrophied muscles can't rip through my shirt like Reqtum's doesn't mean I'm not manly in my own right. I can rip through other men's clothes pretty damn fast.

Paddy 2010-12-22 11:34

Quote:
Originally Posted by drawn&quartered
I propose adding a "wall of text" award for this or next year, but it is pretty obvious who will get it :p
You'll be glad of my text walls when the blacks try to take over.

Quote:
Originally Posted by PST 88
I'm more laconic now.
I agree, if by "laconic" you mean "a penis face".

Weird, I felt a tiny twinge of guilt for that unprovoked if hilariously accurate dickism, whereas all previous conversations with you have just left me wishing I was illiterate. Does this mean...I...like you?

Hell no, ya fuckin' Je...ahh...it hurts...fuck, that tears it - I'm in love with you. I'd scream it from the rooftops if I wasn't so afraid of outside places.

How the fuck did that happen?

Dyldo 2010-12-22 11:40

Its the Jew brainwashing. Also, did you know that Richiepoo is a vegetarian?

Paddy 2010-12-22 12:01

Haha does Rich look like Sage Francis? If so, FUCK! That's not how I pictured him at all. I pictured him more like this:

http://i53.tinypic.com/10eeoeu.jpg

Is this where he got the idea for serving his clam chowder through a shower nozzle?

Pr0az 2010-12-22 12:27

After millions of years of evolution, people become vegetarians. It makes my brain misfire. They should be more afraid of the pharmaceutical supplements they have to take than meat.

PST 88 2010-12-22 20:20

'I'm more a penis face now' is not grammatically correct. Just as I'd expect from the Irish. I don't know why you'd have to wish to be illiterate. It'd be like Martin Lawrence wishing to be black, or Jim wishing to be from an irrelevant country, or Dylan wishing to be inflicted with an STD.

I do look like Sage Francis, if he had a more manly beard. And not a more Mansley beard, because that would just be gay. (Dylan had a Mansley beard the last time he visited Scousetown. He neglected to wipe it off for about a week, until they forced him to when he passed through customs. It was a brief, but serious, international event)

L,B'XXX 2010-12-23 11:59

I had to look up laconic. I thought it had to do with onion milkshakes. Maybe that's something to whip up in a blender for people you hate.

Okay, funny's taken precedence over vulgarity, but I still don't like that word.


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