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Unanything 2010-02-27 10:37

Demonic Dissolution
 
Wrote this yesterday. The title may need to change, though.

Demonic Dissolution

To where you climbed by my abandonment,
has crumbled and collapsed,
and you fell further than I,
retrieved from the earth and given wings by an angel.

In the earth,
I let demons whisper and swell,
taunting calls from high,
fuelled their coming into being,
and the ground began to break.

With each word,
and transition from one chaotic inner world to another,
a legion was mothered,
from the wound in the womb of soul.

You seemed to me as one of them,
a dark, random genie,
granting the twisted negations of wishes,
and I wished for freedom,
only to find myself holding together the ground,
for fear of freeing my groundbreaking friends.

But you have fallen,
and while I rose saved by an angel,
dregs of the dread swirls of infernal life remain,
I wonder now whether the chaotic words will end.

Will you help me dissolve the remaining forms,
and return them to their source in my lightless core?

Our thoughts? Thanks.

L,B'XXX 2010-03-01 07:53

I'm going to give this another read later. I'm getting a few ideas from it, but I'm not quite awake yet.
Are there any typos in the first couple lines because that isn't reading smoothly to me?

Unanything 2010-03-02 11:15

Quote:
Originally Posted by L,B'XXX
I'm going to give this another read later. I'm getting a few ideas from it, but I'm not quite awake yet.
Are there any typos in the first couple lines because that isn't reading smoothly to me?


Just using poetic grammar there. It reads grammatically acceptable to me. I did sit and wonder about it but I am 78% sure that it's gramm. acc.. :confused:

EDIT: figured it out: most people would normally stick the "to" at the end of that first line.

L,B'XXX 2010-03-02 14:49

I read it and read it and FINALLY! I see how the flow is supposed to be. It figures it was me.

You know, you may have meant something totally different, but with the current earthquakes happening I kept seeing those images as the demons being released. The aid of humanity to humanity their dissolution.

Unanything 2010-03-03 08:21

Quote:
Originally Posted by L,B'XXX
I read it and read it and FINALLY! I see how the flow is supposed to be. It figures it was me.

You know, you may have meant something totally different, but with the current earthquakes happening I kept seeing those images as the demons being released. The aid of humanity to humanity their dissolution.


Haha. Oops. This is like my very own Crashing Around You.

Your best bet is to enter my unworldly frame of mind as a student with no television and Internet uasge that consists of a pre-meditated procrastination routine and displaying a list of math's formulae. This is a personal experience one for a change, although I figure there are some other interpretations in there. The chaotic association of earthquakes is quite appropriate, although I think of a garden when I read these lyrics.

I look forward to a thorough analysis. :D

L,B'XXX 2010-03-03 12:40

Edenesque heaven and hell or damn weeds brought forth into the sunlight from subterranean shifts that let them germinate and overpopulate?
I always try to take into account what I know of the author in determining a piece. Some are easier to "read" than others. ;)


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