Video Director

[Dahmers Fridge]

Fed up with the hundreth thread entitled 'worst this' or 'who should die cuz they're arse' well try this for a change.......
.......You can direct and shoot a video for any band (past or present) any song (regardless if it was a big hit or not or already has a video) what would that be and what would the video be like in terms of settings, visuals, story line, who'd be in it etc?.

Seeing as the original Carcass 'Incarnated Solvent Abuse' video was made by art student drop outs drunk on cheap cider I'd have to remake that.
I'd start with the shot of someone sniffing glue then I'd cut to internal shots like on CSI showing the effects the solvent has on the body, I'd also have the various member's impressions appearing through the membrane of the organs at various points. I'd also probably have Bill Steer playing his guitar solo on a guitar made from digestive tract just for shit and giggles. :sickface:

[Robbie Filth]

If i made a music video it would be for Cannibal Corpse - I Cum Blood and it's just be a big porno film with odd shots of the band playing in a field and at the end a huge penis comes on screen and blood drips out the end.

Damn that was Random.

[powersofterror]

haha.

I'd want to do a Children of Bodom video where he finally reveals he's gay.

[Dahmers Fridge]

haha.

I'd want to do a Children of Bodom video where he finally reveals he's gay.

Haha, very good, would that video also end with a huge penis and blood dripping from the end? :D

[Robbie Filth]

Haha, very good, would that video also end with a huge penis and blood dripping from the end? :D
And the the japs eye rips open down to the base to reveal a lepracaun pplaying a saxophone doing a little jig.

[powersofterror]

That's a good idea but not what I was thinking. More like, he'll be doing his shitty Sepultura cover, and everytime he says "yeah" (like 26-27 if I'm not mistaken) he grabs his cock and a picture of Rob halford shows up in anonymous places.

[Robbie Filth]

That could be a good plan.

But i think there should be a video based around this quote:

"Man, I get real sweaty after I wack my dong. Yeah, cause I headbang while I do, and I can't really "Jump" (haha ) like VanHalen in a dorm room, so I just walk back and forth....haha a couple days ago I was jumping up and down on my bed, with my pants down and my roommate came in when I wasn't looking, hahaha"

now that'd be funny. :beer:

[newHELLonEARTH]

haha.

I'd want to do a Children of Bodom video where he finally reveals he's gay.
:rofl: niice..
I'd make one for cryptopsy's benedictine convulsions, and beleive me it'd be cheezy :D the web of the unjesus and all :p

[Transient]

this thread lends it self to more jokes than serious posts, sorry mate!

anyways, id make a video for malevolent creation - premature burial , but get this! theyd all be in corpsepaint and making grim faces. thatd really confuse everyone!

[newHELLonEARTH]

i was actually being serious :p

[far_beyond_sane]

I would do "I Just Saw The Gayest Guy On Earth" with selections from the Photobook.

Or maybe "The Philosopher" because the original video clip was so mind-bendingly shit. Grainy footage of two peewits fucking would make a better music video.

[Transient]

hahaha, the philosopher is so gay. some old dude and a kid in a forest...yawn

edit

they should have just filmed hoglin play. i could watch that chubby bastard play all day long

[powersofterror]

..."Man, I get real sweaty after I wack my dong. Yeah, cause I headbang while I do, and I can't really "Jump" (haha ) like VanHalen in a dorm room, so I just walk back and forth....haha a couple days ago I was jumping up and down on my bed, with my pants down and my roommate came in when I wasn't looking, hahaha"

now that'd be funny. :beer:
Yeah, and I'd use a 311 fan to play me.


I would love to make a serious gore metal video, if that's possible. Like for Cannibal Corpse's hammer smashed face, I just picture this very muscular fucker with a sledge hammer dripping with blood after he had just put a hole through someone's face. Here's how it'd work:

Start with a dark background where the band is playing the intro, banging there heads here and there like usual. Then as the song goes on, the camera draws backward ever so slightly now and again, and soon the 4 guys have become but colored specks inside this face with a gigantic fucking bloody hole in it. As the camera comtinues, till the end of the song, then in a flash the camera wips like armeggedon upward to a shirtless George Fisher with blood smeared across his arms and belly, face covered by his long fucking hair, and in his hand this fucking sledge. Then he turns around and slams his fist into a tv screen that appears out of nowhere.:p

[BeastOfCarrion]

I think we need some corny power metal style videos. You are all too obsessed with blood and sex.

Lets take a Rhapsody song (it doesn't matter wich) and we can have it performed in a forest by a full lepricaun orchestra, there also needs to be faries and whatnot dancing around a maypole.

[Robbie Filth]

I think we need some corny power metal style videos. You are all too obsessed with blood and sex.

What's wrong withb Blood and Sex I would support that in a music video. :beer:

[NZ black metal drumm]

I would re do PAINKILLER by Judas Preist, I mean it is an awesome video sure, but I would re do it Anime style and have the video all about the lyrics as in some awesome super hero dude who slays infinite amounts of posers and generally kicks muchos ass!

[Dahmers Fridge]

this thread lends it self to more jokes than serious posts, sorry mate!

anyways, id make a video for malevolent creation - premature burial , but get this! theyd all be in corpsepaint and making grim faces. thatd really confuse everyone!

Serious posts in a metal tabs forum? Noooo get away! :D
It is by no means a serious thread(when have I ever posted owt serious?) I just wanted to see what fucked up ideas people would have, so far blood, huge cocks and homosexuality seem prominant themes, if I was a psychoanalyst what would that tell me? :D

I am some what saddened that it hasn't turned into a big girly e-fight by the 5th post! :D

[BeastOfCarrion]

What's wrong withb Blood and Sex I would support that in a music video. :beer:
Nothing at all, I just like a bit of variation.

Anyone want a really fucked up video?

Gronibard.
It would be them playing live somewhere in a field, partaking in homosexual activites, with someone dressed as the pokemon from the old logo. All homosexual activies would involve said pokemon in some way.

Which would have a huge cock, that is perpetually ejeculating blood all over the members of the band.

So in summary, playing live, naked, sodomizing the 'satan' pokemon while it ejeculates blood all over the other members of the band.


Is that fucked up enough for everyone?

[johnmansley]

Lets take a Rhapsody song (it doesn't matter wich) and we can have it performed in a forest by a full lepricaun orchestra, there also needs to be faries and whatnot dancing around a maypole.

Sounds like the video for Metallica's Four Leaf Clover in their S&M days...

[powersofterror]

My Power metal video:

A couple of pretty boys jump on horses and gallop out of the screen and never come back.

[humancorpse]

hahahha, that old woman in the philosopher vid is kinda creepy. Anyway, I would probablt do Hate eternal`s Rising legions of black or cryptopsy`s crown of horns. Not sure how they would be though.

[Robbie Filth]

I would do a video for the song i wrote this afternoon about chavs it's just a bunch of samples with the riff from reality by the berserker but it's truly cool.

And the video would involved chavs being generally themselves..........retarded.

[problematic]

:rofl: niice..
I'd make one for cryptopsy's benedictine convulsions, and beleive me it'd be cheezy :D the web of the unjesus and all :p

There is already a video for that song, and man is it cheezy. Its aerobics advertisments... Urban jump or something. I was discussingit with friends and we're still confused

[newHELLonEARTH]

There is already a video for that song, and man is it cheezy. Its aerobics advertisments... Urban jump or something. I was discussingit with friends and we're still confused
wtf? cryptopsy dont have any videos. WHERE IS IT? I NEED TO SEE IT!! IF YOU DONT HAVE A LINK, POST IT ON YOUSENDIT OR SOMETHING!!!